by U. Ben Hadd Hogg  CP  

A cease fire has been accepted by the Rival Hogg Gangs headed by former mayor Boss Hogg and patriarch Syriana Hogg and J.D. Hogg of Longtown and patriarch Irania Hogg. The feud had been going on for generations, no one knows for how long but its mutually agreed that it probably started way back when Cain and Able Hogg got in a fight over the last apple on the tree.

The last month however was the most serious altercation since 1973. It all started when U.Ben Hadd Hogg and Stonewall Lee Hogg of the Longtown Hoggs, stole Boss Hoggs two hybrid breedin' plants of Ridgeway Red. These plants had been bred, baptized with Miracle Grow and brought millions of dollars into the local Ridgeway economy, so much so that Boss gang has fixed up one of his old houses, planted palmetto trees and even has drink machines for all the thirsty visitors.

Just down the road about a block or so Bo Kitty Hogg has a poolroom and nightclub where its snow 12 months of the year. Boss was livid and proceeded to place cherry bombs in all the mail boxes south of old Hwy. 21 early in the morning with timers set to explode at 2:00 P.M. after the mail was delivered. Its one thing to blow up mailboxes its a Confederate offence but to do it on welfare day when the checks arrive along with food stamp vouchers was a hideous crime.

Retribution was sure to come. Longtown Hoggs invaded all of Boss prime patches and set them ablaze causing such a thick cloud of smoke that caused the deer to kiss the coyotes, buzzards lying on their backs, eyes glazed but lookin' full and happy, the rattlers so laid back they could'nd rattle or strike, possums playing dead without threat, the wildbirds chirping Dixie in unison.

The Ridgeway Hoggs invaded the Longtown Hoggs prized yaller watermelon patches that were just about ready for harvest. The all got into their redneck four wheelers and smashed every melon they could find, creating such a summer stench the flies voluntarily asked for Raid. The C.N. (confederate nations) decided the conflict was getting out of hand but before they could act the Longtown Hoggs shotguns in hand went after every Hoggshine still they could find pollutin' all the water causing fish at Lake Wannabee gasping and beggin' to be plucked out of the water.

For two solid weeks you could fry crappie, bass and catfish with a solid punch to it. After eating you could'nd drive for six hours or you would get a DUI. The Ridgeway Hoggs fired back with slingshots loaded with firecrackers designed to scare the hosses in Longtown, which was successful as the stampede destroyed J.D.'s prized Okra and Dixie Pea patch.

Well the Confederate Nations, the C.N. for short has now stationed 1,000 neutral Hogg troops at the demarcation line which is where old 21 meets Longtown Road to divide the warring factions. Hopefully the C.N. can keep the peace till it snows, a rare event till both sides begin makin' spiked snow ice cream then all hell will break lose again.

THEM SNEAKY MARINES!

If Muslims see a naked woman --- they are suppose to kill themselves.
 Ya got to love the Marines  

CASHBOX MAGAZINE IS BACK!!!

Cash Box magazine is a web-based publication, devoted to the music and coin-operated machine industry. It has been publishing since July, 1942.

Cash Box is one of several magazines that published charts of song popularity in the United States of America.

Separate charts are presented for juke box popularity and record sales, again differing from Billboard's methodology. In addition, chart data is presented for specific genres such as country music and southern gospel. In an effort to give you a better representation of real charts, we compare many different resources before post our charts.

Here are some charts from the past. To see new charts go to www.cashboxmagazine.com