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EXTRA! EXTRA! |
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RIDGEWAY ELECTION SCHEDULED
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  We, the editors of ridgewaysouthcarolina.com encourage all voters in the Town of Ridgeway to vote. This is a pivotal point for our fair Town. Running for Mayor are the incumbent Rufus "Boss Hogg" Jones who we've had so much fun with and the beautiful and intelligent Charlene Herring his opponent. The voters will obviously vote for the status quo and like things the way they are, or they will vote for a change so Ridgeway can grow and enter the 21st century. We have a beautiful town and this election is the most important one in the 206 years this town has existed. Folks keep telling us that if "Boss" loses we won't have nothing more to write about, well that ain't so, he'll wind up getting in a jam sooner or later and we'll continue to poke fun at ourselves. Boss Hogg will always be a part of Southern Culture, its in all our genes, black or white, we just can't help it. Charlene has a vision to make Ridgeway a better place to live for all its citizens and Rufus has been Mayor and Pig On the Ridge has been a success, and he and yours truly both need to get off our fat back diet. JUST VOTE, YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. |
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PREACHER PORKY HOGG'S |
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Preacher Porky
Hogg of the Hoggphatt Baptist Church decided to do something different
last Sunday Morn. He said today in church I am going to say a single word
and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want
you to sing whatever hymn comes to mind. |
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RIDGEWAYSOUTHCAROLINA.COM'S FIRST ANNIVERSARY |
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Its been one year folks since we started the satire newspaper and we've
had a lot of fun. Never did we think this would go a year but tens of
thousands of visitors from all over the world look forward to the new shananigans of the Hogg clan. If we can make someone laugh then its worth every bit of it. Our staff is still in place, no one has left and no one intends to. None of us are paid any salary, its all for fun. For all newcomers you can always go back to our archives and check all the articles. Our no. 1 column for the year was the Domestic Violence Story. The column that started this site is still a mystery. Normally in a small town folks know everything but no one ever found out the disposition of Mayor Hogg's criminal intent, yet hes in the mayoral race April 4th. He should have stepped down till the verdict was in but this is Ridgeway folks, everyones kin to everybody and knowing the right connections will buy you anything. Congratulations to our staff reporter Bertha Hogg who tied the knot last week to John Boy Whyte in a beautiful wedding at Longtown Presbyterian Church followed by a wonderful reception at the Windmill Restaurant. J.D. personally notarized the pre nuptial agreement which is everymans dream but too sordid to print here! A year from now po old John will be a rockin' on the old front porch singing "nobody knows the trouble I've seen" followed by Chuck Berry's "my ding a ling". |
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all
overweight started with "Bringing in the Cheese", the other half thought
of spring plantin' and sing "Bringing in the s#$%., Preacher Hogg yelled
its "Sheaves" breathren, of all the songs dealing with Harvest this one
you should know.